If whiny posts bother you, than this is not a post you should be reading. Don’t say I didn’t warn you. I was so excited to start February with a bang and have it just be an awesome month. I was going to be super productive, positive and patient. I was going to keep my anxiety totally in check. I was going to be super mom. All of that good stuff that every woman wants for herself. I don’t know why, but February felt like my month. We aren’t even a week into the month, so I know there is a lot of time left for the month to improve, but wow you guys. So far February has kicked my butt. I have just felt defeated and so quick to get down on myself and my situations. I’m not entirely sure what triggered it but I have been feeling anxiety something fierce for the past week. My patience has been thinner than normal (this one bugs me the most because I’m usually a very patient person) and I have just had a more difficult time being positive and upbeat as often as I normally am. I know that there are days/weeks like this, but it doesn’t make being in them any easier.
H has been really, really cranky lately and for the life of me I can’t figure out why. He just recently popped his two front teeth through, so its not teething and I feel like he’s finally feeling better after being sick for pretty much all of January. I don’t know if this is a one-year old phase or what, but its hard. He throws these epic fits and will throw himself backwards and it scares me because I don’t want him to whack his head into the floor or wall. He’s moodier and sometimes a lot more needy and sometimes wants me to keep my distance (but stay in sight). Its weird. Most people have told me this is just a phase – and I’m sure it is, but again, that doesn’t make being in the phase any easier.
I’m also feeling overwhelmed. With what? Great question. Just generally overwhelmed.
But after all of this whining I have a little public service announcement I want to stress.
Even with this not-so-great week I have had, I have had a simpler time keeping my head above water because of the kindness of people around me. I have found that I have really been grasping onto compliments I’ve been getting this week and as cheesy as it sounds, they have saved me from having a terrible week. On Instagram a girl told me I had a good smile and teeth, another girl told me I’m sweet and another told me I always look pretty. A few different friends texted me this week and complimented me, the way I run my spa and the good friend that I am. At church an old family friend saw me in the hall struggling with H and he came over to me, hugged me and told me he was proud of me for being at church. My husband always tells me I’m pretty, he thanks me and he tells me he loves me. Then someone told me my house was decorated beautifully. I have held onto these compliments for dear life the last couple days and I’m fully crediting them with being the reason why I haven’t had a complete breakdown yet.
I just want to remind you guys that if you ever feel the urge to compliment someone, you need to DO IT because it can really help that someone out. I know sometimes its easy to ignore those promptings and sometimes its easy to feel embarrassed at the thought of saying something nice to someone (why is that?) but please don’t be embarrassed anymore and don’t ignore the urge. I am totally one who has decided it was easier to stay quiet, but I am really challenging myself to stop that. You never know when telling someone they’re beautiful, telling them you’re proud of them, etc can change the direction of their week.