Wonderland

This past weekend was quite honestly, bliss. The kids had Friday and Monday off and Craig had Monday off. We took advantage of the time we’d all get together. It was one of those weekends that fills your cup, rejuvenates your soul and energizes you for the coming week. Our family played lots of games on Friday and Saturday. Over the weekend Craig and I also introduced the kids to Shrek and then watched the second one, as well. Eventually we’ll get to the other two.

On Monday we went up the mountains to Craig’s families cabin to sled and spend some time with family up there. It was a really good time. I couldn’t get over just how beautiful everything was. Absolutely stunning. It was all just so white and sparkly. It was one of those moments where you sit and stare out at the snow covered trees, watching the snow fall and sitting in that beautiful stillness and silence where you could feel the spirit closer. There was more clarity in my mind. Things felt so good and pretty. I am grateful for those moments I was able to steal while we were up there sledding and laughing.

I also got the crude reminder that I’m getting older! We went sledding down the entire mountain and it was a bouncy, chaotic ride. I wanted to be the cool mom, so I grabbed a sled, one of my kids and we shot down. Now I’m so sore ha! We had fun though, so I thiiiiink that was worth it!

2023 Outlook

I decided not to actively do New Years Resolutions this year. I don’t know, it just didn’t feel right this year. I’m still learning how to be a mom of four, I’m finding a new groove that I’m thinking I’ll really enjoy.. I don’t want to set goals that aren’t realistic or thought through. No sense in writing down a list of goals just because everyone else does if I know I’m not going to do much about them, you know?

Simply, I’m working on this: try a little harder to be a little better. I just want to work on myself on my own time in my own way. I have paired that phrase with the word for my year: LOVE. Between those two things I’m feeling really optimistic about this year. I’m not entirely sure how it’ll all go..I really don’t have a plan! But I’m eager.

The older I’m getting the more I’m learning that it’s ok to be yourself and move at your own speed. I don’t need to compare myself to anyone! The only person I should compare myself with is myself! Just trying to be a little better than the person I was yesterday. And if I don’t succeed at that, which I certainly won’t all the time, I can try again and again! I’m giving myself a lot of grace and acceptance. Giving myself lots of love and kindness along the way as well.

Man, it all sounds pretty lovely to me!

xx

Happy 2023!

Hey, we made it! Another year! Welcome to 2023. How are we feeling?

2022 was a good year for me. I got my sweet baby boy in August and he has truly changed our families world for the better. Isn’t it funny how when you welcome a precious new baby into your life you realize just how badly you needed them? Winston was just that for me. Especially with him being another of my rainbow babies, he just holds a special spot in my heart and he healed things that only he could. If nothing else good happened to me in 2022, everything would have been worth it because of this wonderful baby of mine. Happily though, I can tell you that thankfully a lot of good things happened to me in this year. So hip-hip-hooray for that!

The year was also a rather simple one for me, too. Nothing monumental (aside from birthing a perfect human) happened, I wasn’t as healthy as I wanted to be, I lost check of my mental health, I didn’t reach all of my goals.. yet I was still ok. I learned a lot about myself. I learned I don’t have to hold myself to such a high and perfect standard. It’s ok for me to be…whatever I am. I can be imperfect. I can feel frazzled. I can have bad days and good days. I can kick butt at the gym and I can be lazy at home and eat Oreos for lunch. It’s all ok. Maybe that was the biggest lesson I learned in 2022. I’m still learning. I’m still figuring things out and becoming more and more ok with having flaws. Its liberating. It feels really nice. I am happy.

I want more of that in 2023. I’m eager to give myself more grace, kindness and mercy.

For this reason I’ve opted out of new years resolutions and goals to reach. I’m just going to continue being ok with who I am and with my journey. Its fun! It really is.

I have just decided that I’m going to try a little harder to be a little better. Thats my goal. Thats my resolution.

But I did keep up with my tradition of picking a word for myself for the new year. This years word?

LOVE

I want to love more. Myself. Others. I want to be better at serving others and looking for needs I can help with. I want to be less judgmental and more loving. I want to make my home a place where people feel loved, comfortable, special, valued, included and safe. I want to be a person who leaves you feeling better than you felt before you saw me. I want to highlight the good things about you. I want to radiate positivity. I want to ooze love. I’m looking forward to this journey in becoming more of this.

To be quite honest with you, I have no idea what this brand new shiny year holds for me. I’m hopeful. I’m excited. And of course, a little anxious. I hope it’s a good year. I hope my family and I have the opportunities to add thousands more memories to the beautiful ones we have already. I’m feeling pretty great!

Happy New Year, my friends! Be safe! Be kind! Know you’re loved and important!

No Elf on the Shelf

Well it finally happened. I knew it would eventually, but I really hoped it’d take a lot longer. I haven’t adequately prepared myself. I didn’t figure out what answers I’d have for the difficult questions that would be asked. But alas, here we are and the questions have been asked.

Oof.

My oldest boys asked if we could have an elf on the shelf.

Craig and I have been on the same page about this since elf on the shelf happened. NO! No elf. That just seems like…a lot. Our family and close friends who have an elf have even warned us against ever committing to such a task.

But do you know how hard it is to say no to your cute little sons sometimes when they ask for something so excitedly and purely?? It’s kinda brutal.

For those of who who’ve also decided, with Santa of course, that the elf life isn’t for you.. how did you break it to your kids?

My kids really love their advent calendars. Craig and I have sort of told them we decided with Santa that instead of an elf, we’d take a few calendars. They seemed ok with it for the time being, but I know it’s going to come up again.

But why is there this silly part of me that feels like I’m depriving my children of some kind of Christmas magic?

I’m not, right?

Right?

I need validation, people.

Gah. So what would you guys do? How do you kindly tell your kids it happens for some kids, but not for you?

Helps appreciated in advance 🙂

Tis the Season!

Happy December, you guys!!!

Goodness, I adore this time of year. This is such a happy and magical time. Christmas time is always so special, but I think having kids and getting to watch the Christmas season through their eyes makes everything one hundred percent more whimsical and just…magic!!

There aren’t any enormous plans for us this December. Just little Christmas traditions and family parties, but we all can’t wait.

H and E remember so many of our little traditions and are so greatly looking forward to them. There is so much to be excited about!

Something that makes me extra excited is that I am like 98% done with my shopping!!

Merry Christmas, friends!!!

Happy Thanksgiving my friends! I am grateful for you. All of you. I am grateful you’re here and you take time to visit me here.

I am thankful for

•my wonderful family

•our beautiful home, our cars, the food we eat and the clothing we have to keep us comfortable and protected

•my church and the comfort and peace that it endlessly brings me

•my friends. Especially in the last couple of years I’ve made friendships that I know are lasting and important.

•Disney. Cliche as that sounds for me, I’m eternally grateful for its magic

•my body. It’s given us four children. It’s healed from two miscarriages. It’s fed our four children. It’s kept me moving, healthy and able.

•writing. It brings me sanity.

And so much more. My heart is full this season. Life is good.

How Can I Help?

I’m going to blame this whole thing on hormones. But I’m not complaining about it. It’s brought about so many deep thoughts, goals and changes I’m eager to make. So look at that! Postpartum hormones can be good! Haha.

This is going to sound real deep. You ready? Lately I’ve been pondering the meaning of life. (Why do I feel cringey saying that?) It’s been a lot of wondering what my purpose is here. What am I here to do? How can I help people around me? How can I leave a good mark in my tiny corner of this big world?

The thought that keeps reoccurring to me is that generally, I believe the meaning of life – and the purpose of us all – is to love one another.

To me that means to reach out to people. To serve people. To pray for people. To ask how I can help. To give of my time. To listen when people speak. To be judgement free and try to see people how God sees them. To be understanding, forgiving and compassionate. I don’t think the purpose of life is to solely focus on ourselves (but of course that’s not to say we don’t need to love and serve ourselves as well) – I think a tremendous amount of life should be focused on looking outward.

I want to be better at this. I want to be the neighbor that everyone knows is reliable – who will lend help in a seconds notice. Who will leave notes or treats on the front step. Who will pray for your sick kids or struggling family member. Who will text you back or sit on your porch and chat. I want to be helpful. I want to be there for those around me. I want people to feel comfortable, safe and lifted when they are with me.

I’ve spent so many nights thinking of ways I can mindfully start this process. I’m excited to begin. With that all said, thank you for being here. For listening. For reading. For sending comments or messages. You’re all wonderful and I hope someone has told you that lately, and if they haven’t then… YOU’RE WONDERFUL! Now you’ve heard it. Believe it!

Fall is in the Air…and the House

I’m basic, I know. But Fall is my favorite. Everything about it is good, especially the decor. I love Christmas decorations and summery vibes throughout the home, but I’m really truly just obsessed with Fall decor. I love that its just fall-themed in September, Halloween themed in October and then hints of Thanksgiving come out in the decor in November. Its (f)all good.

My decorating style has changed quite a bit over the years I’ve realized. This year I feel like I’ve found my groove though and know how I want to and like to decorate currently, so this year and last year I’ve got several new pieces to add to my collection or replace and I’m just so happy with it.

HAPPY FALL!

Mothers Intuition

I am on this personal mission lately to really up my mom game. I’m a good mom – I truly believe that. But I also truly believe that there is always room for improvement.

I’m in a weird transition period. I’m still figuring out the life of a mom who has a kid in school all day and finding balance between homework and free time after school, not to mention jobs, sports, dinner and so on. I’m still figuring out how best to help my anxious four year old navigate his fears of preschool. He also has really big emotions lately, which is totally fine, but can be hard. We are working on it. I’ve got a two year old who is sweet and sour as they come. She’s honestly the best little light you’ll ever meet, but she can turn on a dime and gives me a real run for my money. Then there’s the newborn, who’s actually like the easiest baby ever, but still has his own needs that I need to meet.

Oh yeah, and the lack of sleep.

But despite all of that…or maybe because of all that, I feel extra inclined to be a better person for them. These four magical humans deserve a really great mom who does her best and works on herself. So that’s what I am striving to give them!

I’ve got goals. Oh you should see my notebooks full of ideas and notes I’ve taken from podcasts on this topic, talks from church leaders on how to be a good parent and make our home a wonderful place for my kids to grow up in, things I see other moms do that seem effective, etc. I’ve got goals, ideas and plans coming out of my ears at this point.

Don’t worry, for me that’s a good thing. I love it.

But as I’ve pondered over the last week how to really make sure I’m there for my kids, I just keep going back to my very own super power. My mothers intuition. I mean it when I say it’s a super power. I have done things and acted on promptings so many times throughout my time as a mother because of my intuition, and it ended up being a huge blessing and has helped and/or protected my children in ways no one else would know how to do.

I strongly believe that when we become mothers, God gives us that divine gift (or super power). He knows motherhood is hard. He gets that it’s overwhelming. He understands that it can be stressful, emotional and exhausting. So instead of giving us a manual, He gives us intuition. He helps us be so in tune with our kids that we can help and serve them in ways only we can. I think this help and service we can give them is even inspired my a loving Heavenly Father.

I’m grateful that as I work on myself and how to be the best mom I can be, I’ll have my intuition to fall back on and heavily rely on. I love having it in me. I love knowing I’ve got my kids backs and that they know I’m here for them.

It’s just really struck me lately how phenomenal it is. You know?

Postpartum Round 4

This is only the beginning, I know that. I’m only four weeks in and historically for me, my postpartum skyrockets a couple of months in. But even with that knowledge, things are going really well so far. My birth with W went really well and the recovery has been pretty easy, all things considered. I feel good and feel like my body is feeling more…me than it ever did in the past postpartum recoveries. Maybe I can chalk that up to the fact that I was in the best shape I’ve been in for a while before I got pregnant with him. But whatever it was that made it happen, I’m loving it. I wasn’t sure how this would all feel especially since this was my first pregnancy/delivery in my 30’s, but its been awesome.

This baby is so easy. He is calm, easy to soothe, goes with the flow, eats like a champ, sleeps pretty well and is so stinkin’ delicious! He is snuggly, smells amazing, loves to be held, takes a binky (yay) and has such a peaceful spirit about him. We’re in love. Completely smitten.

I always say the newborn bubble is magic, and I mean that. I know this phase flies by heartbreakingly fast, so I’m reminding myself of that daily and trying my very best to soak this whole phase in. I’m letting house jobs slide a little more frequently and giving myself a lot of grace and patience. W will only be this tiny for such a small blip of time I can’t let it slip by without cherishing it. Goodness, because this boy is simply extraordinary.

…and is now hungry so I’ve got to go 🙂