28 Pieces of Advice

On my birthday I meant to post 28 pieces of advice since thats how old I turned and because I’ve learned a thing or two in my 28 years of living. But, I decided to take a break from most social media (the blog included) in December, so I clearly didn’t get around to posting that. Instead, I’m posting it now! I’m obviously no professional on how to live a wonderful, happy life and I don’t have all the answers to life and its problems, but I do have some advice on how to feel better and live a little happier. Enjoy!

  1. Don’t be ashamed of being exactly who you are.
  2. Wash your face every morning and every night. It doesn’t take as long as you think it will and its good for you. Also your old lady/man self will thank you for it.
  3. Drink a lot of soda, but also drink water. Find a healthy balance there. Its hard, but try.
  4. Stand up for what you believe in. If you can’t stand up for it, how much do you believe in it?
  5. Do or say something nice to someone else at least once a day. It will change you.
  6. Do or say something nice to yourself at least once a day. It will change you.
  7. Try yoga. Just give it a shot. Life changing.
  8. Find a creative outlet and let it be a getaway for you. It can be scrapbooking, drawing, writing, dancing, making movies, etc. Just do something that lets you escape from time to time.
  9. Don’t think you can do it all. Ask for help and know its ok to say no or take a break when you need one.
  10. Go to Disneyland. Because, duh! If this isn’t an option, binge watch lots of Disneyland YouTube videos. Everyone needs Disney magic in their lives and I will preach this until the day I die.
  11. Laugh at yourself. Its amazing how problems seem to lighten when you have the control to laugh at yourself and not take things so seriously. It takes work, but when its happening, its awesome.
  12. Don’t let social media dictate how you live your life. Do what makes you happy, not what you think you’re supposed to do because ‘everyone else is doing it.’
  13. Sing in the car – even when you’re at a stop light and the person in the car next to you might see your performance.
  14. Take a lot of pictures. Every day! You’ll never regret the number of pictures you have.
  15. Be happy for other people and don’t put others down. Have you heard that quote, “we rise by lifting others?” I love it and I try really hard to live by it.
  16. Pray every morning and every night.
  17. Use your manners. Plain and simple.
  18. Work hard at whatever it is you’re doing. Ron Swanson (from Parks and Rec) has a quote I think about all the time, and while its super funny, its also super relevant. He says, “Never half-ass two things. Whole-ass one thing.”
  19. Be a helpful human. Ask people how you can help them, but also serve without asking what a person needs too, sometimes.
  20. Get enough sleep. Its fun to pretend you don’t need it, but then lack of sleep catches up to you and crap hits the fan.
  21. Create or maintain a good relationship with your grandparents, or someone significantly older than you. I swear some of my greatest lessons and conversations in life come from my grandparents. They know so much and can offer so much wisdom.
  22. Get a really good vacuum and broom. I did that recently and I had no idea just how much of a mood booster it would be.
  23. Occasionally spend time with yourself. Its nice to be alone with yourself and your thoughts sometimes. Its a good reset.
  24. If someone offers to let you hold their baby, do it. There is magic in those tiny adorable little ones. (but also don’t kiss that babies face, no matter how adorable it is – you’ve seen the articles)
  25. Go on walks. Its exercise. Its time outside in the fresh air. Its like a small little therapy session for you body and soul.
  26. Smile at yourself in the mirror. Its awkward at first, but then it starts changing you and how you feel about yourself. Serious.
  27. Don’t be ashamed of wearing comfy clothes more than you wear a pair of jeans and a blouse. Theres no shame in wanting to feel cozy.
  28. My last piece of advice is a song lyric, its my life motto, if you will: “…Try to show kindness in all that you do. Be gentle and loving in deed and in thought…”
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Happy 2019!

Happy New Year (a few days late)!

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I’ve decided to begin 2019 in a way I haven’t started a year in…well forever, I think. As I was looking back at my last few years and the resolutions I’ve set, the word I’ve picked to be my focus for the year, etc, I realized they made me feel bummed out. As I read over my goals and read about all the hopes I had about applying a word to my year, I found I didn’t feel happy. I felt ashamed that I didn’t push myself harder. I felt like I needed a redo for all those years so I could feel better about accomplishing the goals I set for that particular year.

So this year I decided I’m not doing that. This year I don’t have a long list of goals that I more than likely won’t achieve because for me, they aren’t realistic (that always seems to be how my goals were). Instead, I picked a small handful of goals that fall under the category of spiritual, physical and other. They’re all realistic, they’re all going to be good for me and they’re all definitely achievable. I didn’t put a goal on my list of losing 10 pounds, because thats not going to happen. I didn’t put a goal on to read the Book of Mormon x amount of times in the year, because thats not going to happen. I didn’t put a goal on to do anything that I knew in reality I wouldn’t do, but only put on my list because that seems like the ‘cool’ thing to do or because it seems to be what everyone else is doing. Instead I have really simple goals that are small but will be meaningful to me as I take on my 2019. Most of my goals are very private to me, but a few are things such as kneeling for my morning and nightly prayers, reading a General Conference talk at least once a week, making monthly temple trips a goal (but not beating myself up if I don’t get there), drinking more water – but not cutting off soda, getting certified in CPR and doing an act of service as often as I can. They’re things that are going to push me, but will also be exciting for me to work towards. Its a small list too, which in theory will make me more motivated to get to work on them. I’m really excited.

As for my word for the year? I don’t really have one. However if I had to chose one, the word would be, Self. 2018 was a good year, but as I reflected on it, I realized I lost myself, especially towards the end of the year. I just got caught up in other things – good things, even – but I kept pushing myself and my love and interests under the rug and didn’t care to care for myself and make sure I’m doing ok physically, mentally and spiritually. You know? I think this is a common thing that happens to moms, but I’m just hyper aware of it right now. I’m excited to do a lot of self care this year. I’m going to rediscover myself and take care of myself while also being the best mom and wife I know how to be. Maybe, if I feel up to it, I’ll have a word of the month or word of the week, but as for an overall word of the year…I’m just passing this year. Maybe I’ll have one for 2020.

I hope your new year is wonderful. I hope you do great on your resolutions or lack there of. I hope you find joy and happiness within yourself and your heart is light and happy. Thanks for sticking around for yet another year as I pretend I’m a blogger 😉 I appreciate each and every one of you. Happy 2019!

Self Respect Journey

You are kind. You are smart. You are a friend. You are worth it.

I tell my kids this at least once every day. I don’t miss a day saying this because I want my children to remember this. They are young and likely aren’t comprehending what I’m saying yet, but I believe that the more they hear it, the more it will become a part of them. I want them to always love and respect themselves. I want them to believe in themselves. I want them to have confidence in themselves and in turn, I want them to make other people feel good about themselves. I want them to have the ability and the knowledge that they can change their little corner of the world by being a good person. I know there will be days when confidence and self-respect isn’t the easiest thing for them, but I hope they have the tools to combat those negative feelings and I hope they know they can turn to their parents and siblings for a boost in the way they are feeling and the way they are viewing themselves.

As I was thinking about all these things I want for my kids, the thought popped into my head that kids learn by example and they copy what they see. I need to practice what I’m preaching to my babies. I need to be kind. I need to believe I am smart. I need to be a friend. I need to believe I am worth it. This kind of sent me spiraling into this idea that I need to start on a self-respect, self-love journey that my mind, body and soul desperately, desperately are in need of.

And I am so excited.

I’ve been doing some planning and have set up some goals for myself. I’m going to finish the year out strong so in 2019 I can begin the year feeling confident, refreshed, capable and have the self-love and respect for myself that I deserve, want and need. Its also going to focus on serving others and being kind to others, which I feel like is an awesome way to kick off the holiday season!

If this sounds like something you’d like to do with me, join me! I’ll post my ‘schedule’ below – you can switch it up to better cater to you, but I think this would be a fun little journey to go on together during the remainder of the year!

The Weekly Goals

Week 1 Nov. 18-24: Focusing on body love – verbally telling myself things about my body I am grateful for. Doing yoga twice a day, focusing on love and appreciation for my body. I am perfect the way I am right now – I am beautiful the way I am right now. 

Week 2 Nov. 25-Dec. 1: Every day write down 5 good things about my character (no repeats)! Read the list throughout the day and believe those words. At least 10 minutes of quiet  meditation a day (whether that be yoga, laying in bed, sitting in the spare bedroom in the basement, in the bathtub, etc). 

Week 3 Dec. 2-8: Be extra friendly and give service. Every day do something/say something kind to someone else (outside of immediate family) – do this however you think would work best for you and others (in person, on social media, a letter, treats delivered, etc). Be mindful of how many times I say sorry and stop apologizing for my actions that don’t need an apology. For example, sometimes before I start talking or make a comment on something, I’ll start with, ‘sorry,’ or if I feel like I’m in someones way I’ll apologize. I’ll apologize for the way I look, sound, act, etc. Don’t feel embarrassed to have an opinion or to want to speak up or say something. Not all of this needs an apology! I can exist without having to feel like I’m bothering people! 

Week 4 Dec. 9-15: Learn something new each day. Whatever you want to learn about, do it. Want to know more about history? Read about it! Want to learn about constellations? Study them! Want to learn how to paint your nails better? Watch some tutorials. Want to learn how to clean the tile on your kitchen floor? Learn that! Just expand your knowledge every day with something new. Then tell someone what you’ve learned! Don’t feel embarrassed – be proud!

Week 5 Dec. 16-22: Every day write down 50 things you’re grateful for. Yep, 50. They can repeat, just really focus on what you’re thankful for that day. Express your gratitude to the people around you, to yourself and even to objects (haha – you don’t have to, but I’m going to!!) Donate! Find things you can donate to the people around you in need – that can be to people effected by the fires in CA, people who don’t have enough money to have Christmas gifts, people who can’t afford a yummy Christmas meal, etc. Donate and help peoples burdens feel lighter. 

Week 6 Dec. 23-31: Learn more about the Savior. Study the birth of Christ in the scriptures as well as His life. Every day focus on an attribute that Christ has that you want to apply to your life. Strive to be more like Him. Fight the negative thoughts that come to your mind – whether they be about yourself, others, the current situation, etc – and actively replace them with happy thoughts. 

I am so excited to do this. I really am! I have high hopes for this challenge and I’m hoping it really resets my mind. I hope it makes me happier, more positive, more confident and respectful of myself and of others. I believe that if I really do this I will come out a much kinder, happier and content person – and I don’t know about you but that sounds like a dream come true to me!

Happy Anniversary, Us!

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Today is our anniversary! Six whole years of wonderful, exciting marriage! Happy Anniversary to my Wild Man.

We don’t do anything big on anniversaries. We are happiest when we stay in, so tonight we’re planning on just that. We are going to grab food from somewhere yummy then enjoy spending the evening with our boys and each other. It probably sounds like nothing special, but I am so excited.

We were married on November 1st, 2012 in the Mount Timpanogos Temple. There was such perfect weather on that day and the whole day was so smooth sailing, lucky and honestly, relaxing. Everything felt right and good and happy. It was an amazing day. I had no idea just how incredible our future would be together. As I look at our life today, with our sweet boys in our cute little home in the little town we hoped we’d move back to someday, I get really excited for that newly married couple I see in that picture up top. Their future is so bright. Our future is still so bright.

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Happy Anniversary, honey buns. I love you to infinity and beyond.

What I Learned from 10+ Days Away from Social Media

During General Conference a few weekends ago, our Prophet, President Nelson challenged the women of the church to go ten days without using social media or any other form of media that could bring about negative feelings. He also challenged us to read the Book of Mormon by the end of the year. I didn’t think

10 Day Social Media Fast

I’ll be honest, when I first heard the challenge to stay away from social media for ten days I initially thought, no way. I love it too much. But it didn’t take me too many seconds longer to remember that if the Prophet is challenging me to do something, its wise of me to do what he says. So I agreed, in my mind, to do it. I started right then and there. I knew immediately that I would cheat only three times and that would be on Instagram – twice to post my weekly Sunday family picture on my instagram, and once on the day that E turned 11 months old and I’m proud to say that those were the only three times I logged onto Instagram and I never got onto any other social media platform. The only one I stuck with was SnapChat because I really only Snap Wild Man and my sisters and knew there was no harm in that.

The first 2 days were rough, I’m not going to lie. I was embarrassed to realize how many times I picked my phone up during the day to mindlessly open Instagram or Twitter. It all felt really foreign and uncomfortable for those first couple days. Like why did I even have a phone if I couldn’t get on to social media? Pretty quickly I learned to ignore my phone. I would leave it in the other room way more often. I’d hear a buzz come from it and not be so fast to run to see what was happening on my screen. I became more and more comfortable away from my phone and I didn’t realize it at the moment but I got happier, too.

It wasn’t until about six days into my social media fast that I realized I was genuinely happier. I’ve always preached that social media doesn’t get me down or change my mood. I truly didn’t think it did. But I guess I was wrong, because only using my phone for texting, calls and picture taking made me see my world in a whole new light. I felt like I was a much, much better mom and a better wife. I felt more attentive, happy and patient. I was pleased with what I had and felt good about myself. I don’t really know how to explain what I felt, but I just know I felt lighter and brighter. I felt good.

There were still a few times where I’d wish I was scrolling through Instagram or Twitter. I wondered what people were posting and what I was missing out on, but I gradually became more and more ok with feeling out of the loop. I was more invested in what was happening inside of my own little families loop and I knew that was more important.

During the times where social media really would have been nice to have, like during nursing, at night while I lay in bed trying to get tired, etc, I decided that in place of social media I’d read my scriptures from my phone since I had this new deadline to reach by the end of the year. Again, it was a little tricky at first, but ultimately became something so refreshing and so needed even though I had no idea previously how badly I needed that.

Read The Book of Mormon by the End of the Year

This challenge came at such a perfect time for me. The week before Conference I had acknowledged that I was in a rut in my scripture study. I was somewhere in the middle of The Book of Mormon but wasn’t feeling particularly motivated to read or really study. So when President Nelson asked the women to read the scriptures from beginning to end by the end of the year I couldn’t help but smile and get excited. I started at the very  beginning, eager to accomplish this goal – and I’m well on my way.

There haven’t been any life altering blessings coming to me since I’ve started The Book of Mormon this time, but I have felt a lot of peace. I’ve felt more patient and kind. I can feel the spirit easier and I am happier. I’ve been reminded that there is joy and there are blessings in simply obeying the Prophet.

Today

I have only logged onto Twitter four or five times. Maybe I’m speaking too soon, but I think I may be done with Twitter all together. I’ve realized that each time I log on I see a lot of negativity. I’m planning on going through everyone I follow soon and removing a lot of accounts. I want it to be a happy, uplifting place for me and if I can’t make that happen, I’ll likely be saying bye-bye to my once favorite platform.

Instagram, however I really did miss. I wasn’t miserable without it and I could have gone longer, but I was happy to return. Honestly Instagram doesn’t make me feel negative. I only follow friends, family, Disney accounts and some skin care and make up accounts and a couple bloggers so how can it really be that negative? But again, I saw the benefit in not feeling so addicted to it. I was cautious when logging back on because I wanted to make sure I didn’t get sucked into mindlessly scrolling again. So far, I’ve been pretty good about not spending very much time on there. I am back to posting, commenting and liking, but I’m not back to who knows how many hours a day spent scrolling and staring at a screen instead of spending time with my kids or doing something around the house. I’m proud of myself. I’m back on my blogging as well and feel refreshed. I don’t want to spend forever on here, but when I do post, I hope they are positive, happy and uplifting posts. The world has enough heavy, negative stuff – I want to make this tiny portion of my world light.

I’m still plugging away at reading my scriptures. Some days I get a lot in and some days I get a little. I’ve been loosely following a guide to keep me on track to finish by the end of the year and I’m doing pretty well. I’ve found a few new things within its pages I haven’t caught before. More than anything I’m feeling so much peace from reading The Book of Mormon daily. My anxiety has gone down significantly. My confidence has grown and I feel more well-rounded and happy. I’m proud of myself for listening to the Prophet and taking on his challenge. I’m proud of myself for sticking to it. I’m grateful to my loving Heavenly Father who ensured the world today would have this book to read and learn from.

Final Thoughts

I don’t think Social Media is bad. Used correctly, it can be really good. But it can suck you away so easily from whats really important. I learned that I spent way too much time on it. Seriously, I wish I would have counted the number of times I picked my phone up throughout the day those first few days only to remember I wasn’t doing the social media thing for a few days. I was embarrassed and I felt bad that I spent that much time behind my phone and not being present in my kids lives. Thats all changed now, though. Like I said, I still like it and will still use it, but I’ll do it so much less. I’m fine with leaving my phone untouched for hours at a time. Texts can wait. Social Media can wait. Emails can wait. I’m fine not being as active as I once was online. I’m so excited about this new life this fast showed me. I’m a better person because of it, I really am.

As for this Book of Mormon challenge, I just want to say again, there are blessings in listening to the Prophet and obeying his council. His words come from God. We are blessed when we are obedient and I’m seeing that in so many ways since starting and sticking to this challenge. I just feel so much better than I have in a long time. I’m in a really good place and I completely credit that to reading The Book of Mormon.

Diaries of a Notebook Addict

I have this problem.. When I see notebooks I have this strong urge to make them mine. I love holding a new notebook and flipping through the pages, deciding what I could fill the pages with. I used to give into these urges all the time. It got bad. I would have piles of notebooks, journals, planners and notepads just sitting there – waiting to be used. The only problem was I didn’t have a use for them. Over the years I’ve got better about not always giving into my notebook addiction, but you can bet you’ll still find me in those aisles at Target, longingly holding fresh notebooks, trying to decide if I could possibly have a use for the empty pages of these cute notebooks.

Because of this problem I have found …made up… many reasons to ‘need’ several notebooks in my life. Maybe you are like me and want lots of pretty notebooks and pages to fill in your life too! If thats the case, this post is for you. Here are all the different notebooks I currently have and what I use them for. But heres the deal — If I’m telling you about all my notebooks, I want to hear about all of yours! Maybe you’ve found a reason for a notebook that I haven’t yet and will most likely now ‘need’ too, you know? Thanks in advance.

My Planner. I would be lost without my planner so this one is actually a necessity. Mine is from In The Leafy Treetops and I highly recommend it. I’ve been repurchasing the same planner every year for three or four years now and I don’t see how I could ever possibly stray from this one. I love, love, love it.

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My Journal. I have kept a journal and write in it at least once a week (but usually more) since I was 8, I think. I feel better when I write so this has for so long been an outlet for me. Its been my own form of therapy and its been a way for me to unwind, vent, relax and let my mind go. Pro tip: Buy smaller journals so you fill them up quicker and have an excuse to buy a new journal sooner.

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My Gratitude Journal. I decided I wanted to keep a gratitude journal because I found a really cute notebook a long time ago and couldn’t come up with a need for it until I remembered someone telling me they kept a gratitude journal. So I decided I too would keep one. I’m actually really glad I do this. Its helped me focus on gratitude with more ease and has become something I look forward to doing daily.

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Our Family Calendar/Planner. Every Monday we sit down as a family and discuss our upcoming week. Any family plans or bigger individual plans go in the family calendar/planner. Its an easy way to check in with each others plans and to stay up to date on stuff coming up. Yeah, I totally could keep all this information in my own planner (oh wait, i do), but its fun to have another place to write stuff down.

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My Boys Journals. I had the idea about a year ago to keep journals for my boys as if they were writing them. I try to write in them once a week, but it happens a little less than that usually. I just talk about their current likes and dislikes, their stats, their funny little mannerisms and whats going on in their life. I’m hoping someday it’ll be something they look back on and read and are grateful I did it.

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My Scripture Study/Church Notebook. I like to take notes and jot things down when I’m reading the scriptures or a Conference talk. I do the same during Sacrament Meeting talks and Sunday School and Relief Society lessons.

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My Healthy Living Notebook. This is where I put my fitness and healthy lifestyle goals. I write down my goals or challenges and write down positive affirmations and words of motivation. This thing totally holds me accountable. I’m very motivated by being able to check off a box (not on a phone – like with a pen on a piece of paper), so I like to be able to check off that I did a workout or drank all my water that day.

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So what did I miss? What other notebook/journal items do I need??

A Listening Ear

I’ve had the itch to start blogging semi-regularly, again. In my kinda-sorta blog hiatus I’ve come up with a lot of ideas that I’d like to post about, the issue was just finding the time. My little boys take up a lot of my time and I love it and wouldn’t want it any other way so I have no real plans of switching my priorities around, but I’ve decided when I do find some spare time, and if I’m in the mood — I should blog.

 

As I’ve been searching my list of blog post ideas, its been kind of hard for me to decide what to post about first. So I decided to start at the top of the list. The idea simply says, “I’ll listen to you..”

Let me tell you where I’m at right now. I have a two year old and a two and a half month old. I also don’t have a car during the day (Wild Man sold his car and now drives mine to work while we wait for his car to be ready to bring home). Thankfully my very nice mama lives close by and will drive me places if I need to go somewhere, but I don’t like feeling like a burden of hers so for the most part we stay at home all day long, anxiously awaiting Wild Mans return from work for some new entertainment. I love being ‘stuck’ with my boys (i have mixed feelings about being stuck with the dog) and I want to make it clear that I’m not complaining. But sometimes motherhood can feel…well it can kind of make you feel like you’re going crazy. When I spend most of my day trying to communicate with The Captain and baby talking to my babbling newborn I love almost every second of it, but there are also those moments where… I don’t even know what I’m trying to say here. Moms put their kids first 99.9% of the time. It just gets exhausting sometimes and in a weird, not-all-that-bad way, you feel like you’re also kind of losing your old self. I’ll leave it at that.

There have been days where more than anything I just can’t wait to talk. To anyone who will listen to me. Preferably Wild Man. But my mom, sisters, mother-in-law and sisters-in-law are amazing at letting me just talk as well. The majority of the time I talk about my boys. I talk about my day. I talk about how I live in constant fear and worry and have anxiety about things that are completely silly. But it feels so good just to talk and be listened to. I feel less alone. I feel more understood and it gives me back that piece of myself I feel like I sacrifice sometimes. My family will never understand how grateful I am that they just let me talk and that they listen.

I want to return the favor. Even if I don’t know who you are and no matter what stage of life you are in, but especially if you’re in the stay-at-home-with-babies phase of life, I will listen to you! I have my email here on the blog. If you need to talk and you are feeling alone, losing yourself or just need to get some words out there, no matter how crazy or ridiculous they may seem, I’m your girl! I know how vital communication with other adults can be. I know how therapeutic talking can be. Please, if you don’t want to/can’t turn to anyone else – talk to me! I’m a real good listener and I think I’m a good friend.

I will listen to you! My email is ceeceesparkles@gmail.com (and if you know my phone number, text me!) Lets talk. About anything!! I’m here. I’ll listen to you..

xoxo

ceeceesparkles